61. I didn’t know what white flour was until I was about 12
62. My first home-made, self-initiated papier-mâché project was a yucky gluten-ous mess
63. The first time I tried to fry an egg, I cracked the egg dead center over the frying pan, but somehow the laws of physics were miraculously altered for a brief moment, and instead of landing in the pan, the egg leapt around it and landed on the burner below it.
64. I breathed tear gas once. It really hurt.
65. I clean things when I’m stressed
66. Once I scrubbed the kitchen floor on my hands and knees for 3 hours during final exam week
67. Sometimes I get up in the morning, look in the mirror, and shout, “Dad-gummit, I can’t wait ‘til tomorrow!” When my roommate asks why, I tell her, “I get better lookin’ every day!”
68. I bought 20 sticks of modeling clay last week. I don’t even know what it’s for, but it was only $1 for all 20 (can’t pass up a bargain like that, now can I?)
69. I can do an eerily accurate impersonation of Gollum from “Lord of the Rings”
70. I crept up next to my sleeping roommate one night and tried it out. She darn near decked me.
8 comments:
I think 70 may be one of the funniest things I've ever read.
Also, I've been thinking about buying modeling clay because I've discovered that once Play-Doh dries, your sculpture pretty much falls to pieces. And that's just sad.
Hehe... I know many people who clean when they get stressed. I go running on a tread mill, outside, or I lift weights.
Also, do you normally play pranks on your roommates like in 70?
Briguy, did your dough bunny crumble? That's a shame.
Mandie, I'm pretty careful who I play pranks on. That particular roommate was a bit of a prankster herself, so I knew she'd take it in stride.
mb,
I do the same thing about cleaning. I clean when I'm mad too.
#67 made me laugh so hard I nearly peed my pants!
Hey, the tear gas... was that in high school? 'Cause I remember that. It was at the end of school and people started coughing and crying... I didn't really catch on until I started coughing and crying. Whoever did that was stupid. They should have done it *during* school. We could have gotten out early!
hp, I'm glad you got a good laugh - I usually do, too :)
bigred - no, the tear gas was when I was in Ecuador. There had been a public demonstration, and the police had broken it up with tear gas. I walked down the wrong street at the wrong time. I think I heard about the high school incident, though. Wacky!
i am amused by your writing.
that sentence was delivered in
a deadpan comedy critic voice.
uh.
I experience exam week now.
when it is 2:33am, too late to
scrub the floor, i polish my shoes. they are quite shiny right now.
chrisso - wish I knew what a deadpan comedy critic voice sounded like.
Suerte con los examenes!
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